Are you grieving the loss of a beloved pet? Not everyone understands the loss of a pet in the way they do a spouse or grandparent.
But the truth is your pet has become a part of your family.
Their loss is a very tragic moment in your life. It is not something that you should feel bad about, your feelings of loss are legitimate and understandable.
Pet loss is an intense loss that can’t be denied or kept bottled up. Your pet becomes a part of your family and your life. Just as when you lose a loved one, there is a large hole in your life when you lose a beloved pet.
Your pet was an integral part of your everyday life. They are the first one to greet you in the morning and the last one you say good night to each evening. Sometimes our pet might even be closer than some of our family. Take the time to properly grieve the loss of your pet just as you would a loved one.
One of the hardest decisions you will have to make is to decide what to do with your pet after they pass. Will you bury them right away? Will you have the vet handle their remains? Or, will you choose to have your beloved pet cremated so you can save their ashes?
Having your pet’s ashes to remember your beloved furry family member can help to ease the pain as you cope with the loss of your pet. It is important that you allow yourself to fully grieve their loss and not try to stuff your feelings.
Click here to know more on Healing After Loss Through The Grieving Process.
The grieving process is not simply a straight line in which you move from denial to anger or bargaining. Some of these stages will happen out of order, sometimes you might go back to a previous stage, and sometimes you will stay in a certain stage for a while.
This is all very normal, and you should not have to worry about how to work through your grief and sadness. There is no timeline you have to follow when you are grieving your pet. It is important to follow your heart and process your grief in a healthy way.
Don’t go through the emotions just because that is what others expect of you. Dealing with the loss and grief of your pet in a healthy way will ensure that you will be able to move on with your life. It doesn’t mean you will forget about them. And it definitely doesn’t mean you won’t be sad from time to time as certain memories come back to you.
But dealing with your emotions in a healthy way is important to ensure that the grief and sadness doesn’t become overwhelming. Grieving is a natural and healthy process. Don’t let anyone get in the way of being able to fully grieve the loss of your pet. Your pet has become a valuable and loved member of your family. Just as you would grieve the loss of a loved one, grieving the loss of your pet will take time.
Additionally, as you work your way through your grieving process you might eventually decide to have your pet cremated so as to save their memory through their ashes. There are a number of ideas for what you can do with your pet’s cremains.
There are a variety of different ways in which you can remember your pet with the cremated remains. Of course, there is no right or wrong answer and we encourage families to choose an idea that helps them remember their pet in a way that brings the most amount of comfort and peace.
Scattering ashes of a loved one is a time-honored tradition. Recently it has become a more common practice, including the scattering of your pet’s ashes. So, what is scattering? What this means is you take the cremains of your loved one or pet to their most beloved place.
For some this might be a specific beach, for others it might be a remote mountain top, regardless of the location when you are scattering your loved one’s ashes you are returning them to nature and allowing them to live on in their favorite spot forever.
Most public places, such as local parks or national parks, will allow you to scatter your pet’s ashes as long as you ask first and keep it discreet. Not everyone will be as at peace at the idea of scattering ashes, and so most public places will ask you to scatter the ashes quietly and at a location that is away from the crowds.
Think about your pet’s favorite location. Did you cat have a special tree they always climbed? Was there a park your dog especially enjoyed visiting? Scattering your pet’s ashes in their favorite location will allow you to know they are in their favorite place. And it gives you a place to visit them when you need that in your healing process.
If the beach was your favorite getaway with your pet, then perhaps you can consider trenching their ashes at the beach. This involves digging a small trench in the sand at low tide and then pouring the cremains of your pet into the trench. You can then have a short ceremony commemorating the life of your pet.
You might also consider inviting a close friend or anyone else who especially loved your pet to come along and be there to support you during this emotional time. As the tide comes in it will slowly carry your pet’s ashes out to sea. Each time you visit this particular beach you will think of your pet and feel close to their spirit long after they are gone.
If you know you are going to be in your home for a long time, then your family could decide to create a small backyard cemetery. This can be a great way to memorialize your pet and keep them close to your family. Depending on your family this can be as small and discreet, or as big and as elaborate, as you want it to be.
Having a place to visit your beloved pet will help you as you work through the grieving process and allow you to have a special memorial for them. Especially if you have children who were very close to the family pet this can be a great option to keep them near to the family home. It will help them during their time of grief to feel close to their pet and be able to visit them in the backyard anytime they would like.
If you have a garden, this can be a great spot where you will be spending time each spring and will enjoy each year when your plants bloom. Each year when the plants bloom, they will remind you that life blooms anew and there is a light at the end of your grief tunnel.
Be sure to check first with your local town or municipality for regulations surrounding pet burial at home and be aware of some important tips for laying your pet to rest.
If you don’t have a garden in your back yard, maybe now is a time to start one. Depending on the climate in your area there are a few different options you might consider. If your winters are long and especially unforgiving you might want to consider starting with a sapling in a green house. Nurture the young tree until it is big enough to survive out in your yard.
You can start by choosing a special location of your yard. From there you can then decide the type of tree you would like to grow. Maybe there is a special type your cat liked to climb; this could make for a special memory in honor of your cat.
Once you have determined the location in your yard, then chosen the type of tree, and possibly even nurtured this tree in a greenhouse for a year, now it is time to grow your tree in memory of your pet.
Dig your hole size according to the type of tree you are planting. Incorporate your pet’s ashes into the hole and have a small ceremony to commemorate the memory of your beloved pet. Now plant your tree and fill in your hole.
Care for, water, and feed your young tree just as you did for your pet. Each time you spend time in your yard you will see that tree and think of your pet. Each time you water your tree and care for it you can think of all the fun memories you had with your pet. This is a great way to always keep your pet close to you and keep their memory alive forever.
There are also organizations such as A Living Tribute that plant tress in a designated US National Forest in honor or memory of a loved one or pet. You can choose to have one tree planted or a grove of trees and you can have a tree planted as a gift to someone that is grieving the loss of their pet.
Another great option for a way to keep your pet’s ashes near you every day is to have a beautiful piece of cremation jewelry made of their cremains. Here at Everlasting Memories this is what we specialize in.
Pet cremation jewelry consists of a jewelry pendant that has a hollowed out interior compartment the compartment is accessed by removing the threaded bail or screw. A pinch or about ⅛ teaspoon of cremated ashes can be added to the jewelry and then simply seal the opening and wear!
A few of our favorites:
This beautiful pet cremation jewelry is the Forever Collection Copper In My Heart Pet Cremation Jewelry. The copper heart has a small paw print that is stamped into the front of the heart and the bail unscrews for easy loading of the ashes.
This pet pendant makes for a wonderful grieving gift for a child or a close friend that has experienced their first loss of a family pet. The Copper In My Heart includes a matching chain and all the tools needed to fill and seal.
The Sterling Silver Stallion Cremation Jewelry is a wonderful way to honor the life of an equine that you lost. The detail on this .925 sterling silver horse pendant is exceptional and it is one of our customer favorites!
Choose the Silver Stallion urn pendant as a gift for a parent that has lost a horse they cherished or for a riding instructor that lost her treasured riding companion. Each Stallion pendant will hold a pinch of ashes and includes a matching chain.
Pet cremation jewelry can also be filled with a small piece of their hair or fur should you prefer or even a small piece of a favorite toy or blanket. Most pet cremation jewelry pendants can also be further personalized by adding engraved text or a birthstone rider heart or switching up the chain.
Even if you do decide to scatter your pet’s ashes, you might want to consider keeping a small amount back for another purpose. Namely, you can have your pet’s ashes used as the medium for painting a portrait of your pet.
Since the artist uses the ashes, most of these portraits are black and white renderings of a photograph you have of your pet or even a family photo with your pet. A coating is usually used to memorialize the portrait and allow you to hang it and enjoy the memory of your pet for years to come.
Having a portrait of your pet hanging in your home is a wonderful way to keep their memory alive. And knowing that a small piece of your favorite pet is incorporated into the painting is a lovely way of keeping them close to you.
Another option for what to do with your pet’s ashes is to put them in personalized pet urns for dog ashes or another type of cremation urn. You can either display the urn in your home or bury it somewhere special. The size of the urn will matter based on the size of your pet. Generally speaking, most experts advise you to allow for one cubic inch of space for every pound that your pet weighed. So, for example, a 10-pound cat would need a 10 cubic inch urn, while a 50-pound dog would need a much bigger urn, namely 50 cubic inches in size.
Pet cremation urns are made from a variety of materials and aesthetics which means that you can choose what appeals to you most. The wide variety of materials also means that the pet urn can be easily integrated into your home's decor.
The Forever And Ever Pet Cremation Urn is made of crushed marble and resin and depicts a hand-painted heavenly scene of cat's that have crossed The Rainbow Bridge. The urn loads easily from the top and will hold 30 cubic inches of cremated remains or the ashes of a cat that was 30 lbs in body weight.
Is It Time For A New Pet
You don’t need to keep a full-sized urn of your pet either. You have the option of putting a small amount of your pet’s ashes into a stunning urn within a small piece of jewelry. Here at Everlasting Memories we have many options for cremation pet urns that provide a private way to hold onto a memory of your pet.
One of our favorites is the Loving Cylinder Pet Urn Keepsake. The beautiful tribute etched into the gold-plated cylinder is an amazing memorial for your beloved pet. You will be able to keep a small part of your pet’s ashes with you every day and everywhere you go with this simple understated keepsake jewelry.
Again, if you have a garden and enjoy spending time there, then a garden stone might be a great idea for what to do with your pet’s ashes. Your pet’s ashes can be mixed into cement and created into a beautiful decorative stone for your garden.
You can talk to a local artist and find out what your options are. But your options are pretty much endless as you can decide on the size and color of your stone. You might even be able to have a short saying written into the cement before it dries so that every time you read it you think of your pet. Ashstone Memorials offers a great selection of garden stones that incorporate pet ashes as well as a do-it-yourself kit.
A garden stone is also a great alternative if you don’t think you will be in your home for very long. A garden stone can come with you to your next home and garden, thus allowing you to keep the memory of your pet with you always. Regardless of where you go, you will be able to keep your commemorative stone with you always. And each time you move to a new home you can choose the perfect spot to keep your beloved pet with you forever.
If tattoos are your style, then having a tattoo of your pet can be a fantastic way to memorialize your beloved pet forever. Some tattoo artists will even add a small amount of the ashes to the ink as they draw your tattoo. This way your pet truly becomes a part of you and will forever be remembered.
Regardless of if you use their ashes or not, the permanence of a tattoo will allow you keep their memory alive forever. Each time you see your beautiful piece of body art you will be reminded of your beloved pet. Keep their memory alive forever with a tattoo in their honor.
Just as with the glass work in the idea of creating a stained-glass window or other piece of decoration, you can also have your pet’s ashes incorporated into a piece of pottery.
Using a similar technique, an artist will add your pet’s ashes into the pottery as they are creating the clay. Then they will create a beautiful piece of pottery using this cremation-infused clay.
Keep your pottery on display and every time you see it you will think of your special bond with your pet. This can be a wonderful alternative to keeping an urn on your mantle in which the cremains are kept. Only you will know that your pet’s ashes have been made into the pottery itself.
Just as with other options in the list, this information can be kept to yourself or shared as freely as you would like.
Ashes can also be incorporated into an amazing firework display that can be enjoyed. Send your pet into the atmosphere by having fireworks infused with your pet’s ashes. This can be a very unique and special way to scatter your pet’s ashes.
As we discussed earlier there are a number of ways to scatter ashes. From simply casting your pet’s ashes into the wind from a mountain top to creating a trench in the beach and allowing the tide to scatter their ashes, your options are endless.
This is especially true when it comes to incorporating your pet’s ashes into a firework display. Invite all your family and friends over. Allow everyone who would like to participate to say a short memory they have of the family pet.
You could even put together a fun video montage with all your pictures and memories of your pet. After the celebration scatter your pet’s ashes by lighting off a beautiful firework display that has your pet’s ashes built into it.
You can send a small amount of your pet’s ashes to an artist who will incorporate your pet’s cremains into glass. The ashes are melted into the glass at a very high temperature by the artist. This glass can then be used to create a beautiful masterpiece of stained glass that you can enjoy forever.
Speak with a local glass artist in your area and find out if this is something that they would be willing to do. Or a simple Google search will help you find a glass artist who specializes in this line of work. Stained glass art is a show-stopping way of keeping your pet with you always. Everyone will stop to admire to the beauty of your stained-glass art. However, it is up to you as to whether or not you want to share with them that you had your pet’s ashes incorporated into the glass.
This can be a personal piece of art. You can keep your pet alive in your heart each time you admire the beauty of it. Only you need to know that your pet’s memory is being kept alive long after they are gone.
If you have a particular family member that you want this keepsake to go to after you are gone, be sure they understand the importance of it. But the beauty of a stained-glass art is that your pet’s ashes are being kept close by in a very discreet manner.
Similar to the stained-glass and pottery, you can also have an artist add a small amount of your pet’s ashes into a glass paperweight. If wearing glass jewelry isn’t your style, then perhaps a decorative paperweight for your office is just what will help you remember your pet in a beautiful way each day.
An artist can create a paperweight into just about any shape and color that you would like, allowing you to personalize your paperweight just for you and your pet. Each time you sit at your desk to work you will see your beautiful paperweight and be reminded of the bond you shared with your beloved pet.
There are artists that specialize in this type of artwork. It will be best to find one of them to ensure that your pet’s memories are treated with the utmost professionalism just as we do with our jewelry making.
A quick browse through Pinterest or Etsy will show you just how many ideas there are for using your pet’s ashes to create a Christmas ornament.
Add memories to your keepsakes by having a special Christmas ornament created using your pet’s cremains. Each year at the holidays as you decorate your tree you can hang your beautiful ornament and remember your faithful furry friend.
Artists such as the ones at Art From Ashes make a beautiful ornament (also called a friendship ball) by incorporating the ashes right into the glass or resin of the ornament itself. These ornaments can be enjoyed during the holiday season or hung in a window to enjoy all throughout the year.
Similarly, you can also choose to have a sentimental engraving to always remember your special pet.
While an hourglass urn is not necessarily an hourglass in terms of keeping time, it can be a beautiful decoration for your mantle. In the same way of keeping an urn on your mantle, an hourglass incorporates the ashes into the glass middle allowing you to see the ashes flow from one side to the other.
These are simply decorative only as mentioned, it doesn’t keep time. But it is a beautiful memorial for your beloved pet. Why have a normal urn on your mantle when you can create a special hourglass urn?
Just Hourglasses has a beautiful selection of hourglasses that will hold approximately a cup and a half of cremated ashes. The hourglasses are shipped disassembled and included instructions on how to assemble and epoxy to seal the hourglass.
What a great way to incorporate art and decoration with your urn so that you can keep it on display forever.
Just as a diamond is created from pressure and carbon over thousands of years, an artist can simulate the process and create a synthetic diamond using your pet’s ashes.
You can have a jeweler set your diamond into any piece of jewelry you would like. From a ring to a necklace, this can be a beautiful piece of jewelry that you will want to wear every day.
Similar to our beautiful cremation jewelry, having a lovely commemorative keepsake will allow you to keep their memory alive and close to you all times.
Again, you only need to tell people what is actually in your jewelry when you feel up to it. All of these ideas are wonderful ways to help you process your grief for your pet. Not everyone will understand and there will be some days that are harder than others. In those moments you can choose to keep your memories and artistic creation to yourself.
These keepsakes are for you and to help you process your grief. It is okay to work through your emotions at your own pace and allow others into your feelings when you are ready.
We have some ways in which you can help loved ones and friends that have lost a treasured pet decide what they would like to do with the ashes. Always keep in mind that everyone grieves differently and approach your loved one or friend very gently.
One tip for handling your grief is to reach out to a friend. But sometimes reaching out can be too difficult for someone who has just lost their best friend. And this is just what our pets become, your best friend.
If you have a friend or loved one who has recently lost their beloved pet, then maybe you should think about reaching out to them first. This can take an enormous pressure off your friend or family member in their time of grief.
Bring over some hot coffee or tea and sit with your friend. Allow them to process their grief, some people need to talk through their emotions, other prefer silence. Either way, your calming presence can help your friend in immeasurable ways.
If you think your friend would be receptive to cremating their pet, share this article with them. Sometimes in the depths of our darkness, thinking clearly is very difficult to do. Be their friend and help them work through the process and share with them the steps needed to decide what to do.
If your friend decided not to have their pet cremated, or if this wasn’t an option for them, you can always give them a small gift to remember their beloved pet by.
A perfect example of a beautiful memorial for your friend and their pet would be to have a photo pendant made for them.
If you have a photo of their pet, or a picture of them with their pet, then you can send that to us, and we will make a special necklace or keychain engraved with their picture on it like with the Silver Pet Bone Photo Engraved Pendant.
This is a beautiful tribute to your friend and their beloved pet, and one that is sure to be treasured forever.
The healing process can be messy, it can take time, and it is always difficult to navigate through. Be there for your friend as they find their way through the process and emotions. Encourage your friend or family member to celebrate the life of their pet rather than focus on their loss.
Just as when you grieve the loss of a family member, when you lose your beloved pet you will also go through the stages of grief. It is important to understand that there is no “right” way to process your grief. Each situation is unique and your relationship with your pet is also unique.
Not everyone will understand your loss and sadness, but the important thing to remember is that it’s okay. You and your pet had a bond that nobody else needs to understand. You know in your heart what made your relationship so special.
As you process your grief, it is our hope that you are able to use the ideas in this article to decide the final resting place for your beloved pet. There are so many ideas and many of them offer ways for you to keep a small part of your pet with you forever. Whether you choose to scatter your pet’s ashes across their favorite park or beach, or if you decide to have a small part of them made into a piece of jewelry you can wear every day, it is completely up to you what to do with your beloved pet.
The important thing to remember now is to process your grief in a healthy way. Work through your many feelings and emotions. Don’t let other people dictate how or when you are able to work through your grief process. And when you are ready, we are here to help you every step of the way.
You can honor your faithful companion with the truly personalized keepsake memorials we offer here at Everlasting Memories. We understand what you are going through and want to help you make the best decision that will genuinely commemorate the love you had for your pet.
Further reading:
Grief and Grieving: Healing After Loss Through The Grieving Process
The Ultimate Pet Cremation Jewelry Guide
Is it time for a new pet? Do's and Don'ts on choosing a pet after loss.
November 20, 2019 by Frances Kay